The Hell of a Surprise

It was a perfect Sunday. Last night I slept like a baby. In Delhi, fresh chillness had finally arrived and was slowly smothering the morning sleep by a nice cozy blanket. My own blanket was neatly folded and kept on a chair - like hundreds of other things which were mismanaged and misplaced all over my little den, and I was rather sunk under a softness, which only matched Taniya and her precious brown Kashmere quilt. But she wasn’t here. She must be sleeping in other hemisphere - maybe in an ocean of whiteness in a luxury resort, while her face resonated like the morning star and the little sound of her breath filled the room with life. Yesterday she texted that she was visiting a five-star with her friends - and that was subtle enough for me to not to expect any call or text this morning. Maybe she’d call later at the day, when she’d wake up and we’d do group video chat to our kids in Kolkata before missing them badly. But I had her quilt.

I pulled it up to cover my face and sniffed. I shouldn’t have washed it - because her smell was gone and all that I got was the dry odour of detergent. But the very sense that her favourite blanket, which she didn’t miss to use even for a single day for the last four years was with me, surely was enough for me to compensate for anything. She told that she had flight for Delhi in three days, and I had already arranged an entry pass to receive her at airport. I didn’t want to miss the moment of seeing her walking towards me through aero-bridge with a smile, only compared to sunshine. And I had planned a surprise for her, as she loved surprises - I was gonna take her to the premium lounge and arrange a nice spa and massage, before driving her to my flat (she never rode my car before). I was gonna give her red roses and lilies, adorned with blue orchids, and I was gonna kiss her long, only to be broken by a hot steamy sex, which I craved and was due for months. I knew it was not a SURPRISE kind of surprise, but she knew me well - and she’d be happy that I had a thought and implemented it decently. I loved her watching being happy-

Door bell rang. Once. Surely it was my maid. She had nice name - Phoolmati. Short stout and word-wise minimalist. She hardly used verbs in her sentences, as they were surprisingly redundant. I got down and unhitched door. She came in without any usual greeting (I loved that) and then headed towards the kitchen. I did my usual stuff - returning to still warm bed and hiding under comfy quilt. I knew she’d bring tea for me exactly in five minutes and then would ask about sabzi, Bhaiya sabzi? I’d drag my ass over the chair at balcony with the cup of tea and tell her to prepare anything she found suitable.

Door bell rang. Once. Surely it was garbage collector. Isn’t he early? He was a nice fellow - I liked him for his soft manner and nice smile. I thought I’d give a pass though. I could always throw the garbage later. I really wanted to roll over and sleep for the next five minutes, before Phoolmati stopped by with an indifferent tone and a single word, Chaye.

Door bell rang. Twice. I wasn’t sure it was garbage collector anymore. He never rang it twice. It could be a delivery boy or something. I was super annoyed, as I had to drag my fat body to the door, look into the peep hole (there was no one), and then unhitch it with a bubbling slang, and when that bubble was on throat to be delivered with right amount of temper - time froze.

Taniya.

What the f**k! I blinked my eyes…one…two…three. Shit. She was still there. She wasn’t in a dream. Or she was? Maybe it was that kind of elaborate dream, which seemed more real than realities. I heard her giggling. Her phone was at eye level, and she was so clear, so vivid. I could touch her. Time seemed to be frozen, until she yelled, SURPRISE. 

The video was an embarrassment, though people seemed to have good laugh over it. Some said, I passed the loyalty test, as there was no girlfriend with me. Some said, I was over surprised, and my mouth was kept open longer than just being normally surprised. But I knew what I was doing then.


I again missed a chance to surprise her. And I’d never ever gonna surprise her at this insane level.

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